The Little Things

My goal for the immediate future is to remember that the only thing I really have control over in life is how I react to it and deal with it. 

I have been having a hard time caring about what I deem to be trivial things people post on FB etc.  Oh want to complain that you need coffee, how about by thankful your not checking into a hospital for chemo.  Yep, that has been my attitude, and it's not fair.  Not only that, it's not a good way to keep my friends. 

Two things I have to fight when life gets real:
-Withdrawing and only wanting to be around Mark and Sky and focusing on the situation and what needs to be done.
-"Trivial" things, comments etc make me crazy.  I just don't care about anything other than the issue at hand.  Especially when it's a life and death situation.

To that end I'm finding little things every day I can be thankful for and happy about.  The only way I feel like I can counteract the worry, sadness and emotions about Grandpas situation is to find positive things to focus on instead. 

Yesterday I was thankful to find out that Grandpa checks in next Tuesday for surgery.  I wanted it to be this week only because time is life when it comes to cancer.  But, Tuesday is perfect because Mark works from home on Tuesday.  That means he can watch Sky so that I can go with Dad and Grandpa and take notes, offer support, make phone calls or whatever else I can do to help navigate the world of cancer treatment.  Knowing Sky will be taken care of by her favorite person in the world makes it easier for me to focus on what I need to do.

Today I'm thankful for our little sleeping champ!  I'm pretty sure she is getting ready to shoot up about 10 sizes based on how much she is sleeping and eating the last few weeks.  She is getting 13 to 14 hours of sleep a night!  I'm thankful to have a little extra time to drink coffee, check email and blog in the mornings.  It's a nice way to start the day.

By the way...her eating is out of control on so many levels.  She is hungry all the time!  10 minutes after a meal she wants a snack, and for the first time ever she is being picky about it.  It's taking more and more effort to get her to eat things that in the past were no big deal at all.  I don't know if it's her age and realizing she has an opinion and therefore wants a say, or if her taste is changing, or what, but I'm not loving it.  Anyone else had to deal with this? 

I don't want to alienate my friends or be a downer on the blog/FB/or in real life.  There is enough negativity in the world without me adding to it.  I hope this new focus will help with all that.  If it doesn't feel free to call me out and tell me I'm being miserable to be around.  :)